December 22, 2016

grief during the holidays

As someone who is all too familiar with grief, I realize that it can be hard especially during the holidays.  Whether you've recently lost someone, or they've been gone for 20 years, this time of year can bring up memories or even make you wonder what memories could have been created.  Even if you don't celebrate Christmas, seeing others with their mothers, fathers, and having big family dinners can make you feel especially lonely or left out.  Here are some things that I've found are helpful to get through the holiday season.

  • Reach out!
    • It's so easy to let yourself think "why me?, Why am I alone?".  If you have close friends or extended family see if you can come hang with them!  Just make sure you bring a bottle of wine! ;)  
  • Be a blessing to someone else.
    • Take the focus from yourself and find a way to help others whether that is serving dinner at your local Salvation Army, or visiting a nursing home.  Being with my Grandma while she was in and out of nursing homes was my first real experience in a nursing home.  Regardless if the nursing home is not that fancy, or if it resembles a five star hotel, it's all so sad to me.  There are so many that are there who don't have family that visit them often.  The holidays (as is any time of year) is a great time to go and visit and spread some cheer.
  • REST.
    • Christmas was never celebrated in my home, so growing up it was always a good time to REST.  Most if not all businesses are closed on this day, so for 24 hours the world seems somewhat quiet and peaceful.  One year I actually was alone, and I made dinner for myself and watched movies.  I was just thankful to have a day off, and I enjoyed the peace and silence.  Haha. Take the day to sleep in, catch up on that book you've been meaning to finish, or get a head start on those New Year's resolutions!  


  1. Love your recommendations!!!! Great way to look at things differently!
    Ruqayyah (ReDpants Designs)

  2. Thanks for sharing. I've never celebrated holidays but I looked forward to those days because I could spend quality time with my husband. So now I dread those days off, even though I like being off of work, because he is not here. We would just sleep in, wake up, eat something and have a good time. I just feel so alone now. No one understands until it affects their life.

    1. So true! No one understands if they haven't experienced loss themselves. You should still do exactly what y'all would do together! I know it's hard! Be strong!


Latest Instagrams

© Amberly D'Anna. Design by FCD.