September 19, 2017

girl writing on paper

Disclaimer:  This is not a "whoa is me" post.  So if you were hoping or looking for that, I'd suggest you go to Pinterest and search for "whoa is me" quotes.  Trust me, there are plenty of those out there...I'd know.  Anyway, if you're like me...and you're thirty *cough, cough* something and still single, it's oooooookay.  I've been through several relationships.  Some of them have left me feeling very unwanted and unworthy of love.  I allowed myself to stay in situations that I thought were safe, but it took an emotional toll on me.  I realized after I was out of that situation that I had been verbally and emotionally abused.  He would get intoxicated and accuse me of things I hadn't done or said, call me ugly names, and then apologize the next morning when he was sober.  This cycle would happen several times a month.  Finally I'd had enough and prayed that God would open up a way for me to get out.  And when He did, I ran...almost literally, lol.  

The point is is that I realized that I was continually allowing myself to stay in relationships simply because I was scared of being alone.  Scared that I would be 30 and still unmarried and without kids.  Growing up especially in the South, as women we are taught that you go to school, get married, and then have kids.  All of this is supposed to happen no later than 25.  And each birthday after that, the times that you are asked "when are you going to get married?" gets so annoying.  And by the time you're in your thirties, when you look around and most of your classmates are on their second or third kid you start to lose hope.  What I've come to understand is (with the help of a therapist), is those people's timelines are not mine (And also that break-ups happen and to stop associating it with the death of a loved person).  Maybe there are other things I am supposed to accomplish before that comes.  So right now I'm not really concerned whether or not I'll get to fulfill my dreams of having a "Pinterest-y" wedding.  I'm taking this single-ness as a sign that God is allowing me time to go after HIM and the career goals I have without any distractions.  

So, if you're still waiting on your Prince Charming, and think you should just settle because you're running out of time, DON'T.  There are many people I know that settled when they were in their early twenties and wish they hadn't.  Take this time to travel, learn, and explore.  We weren't all born at the same exact time were we?  No.  So we don't have to ALL experience each life stage at the same exact time! 

Thanks for reading.  Xoxo.


  1. Love this! It needs to be said more that being single ok and building a solid relationship with God is the best thing you can do. Going into your next relationship with him will surely make a true difference in how that relationship blossoms!! Keep the post coming!! ❤️

  2. THAT!!! I'm a 58 year old mother and grandmother whir would rather work two jobs than to settle! Thanks Amberly


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